Get Nothing Right, First

​Does anyone play “Wordle?” It’s a game on the New York Times gaming app where you guess a 5-letter word, then receive feedback on whether some or all of your letters are correct. You then adjust your guess, until you guess the word of the day.
 
What I’ve noticed is that, for me, if I get none of the letters, it’s much easier to solve the puzzle than if I get many of the letters (but out of order) on the first or second try. There’s something about knowing what absolutely does not work that is very helpful. By failing in a spectacular way, it’s much easier to see what not to do. And lo and behold, with that narrowed playing field, my next move is more obvious.
 
Thomas Edison, when working on the incandescent light bulb, quite famously recognizes this same thing when he is reported to have assured his discouraged assistant that they had, “…learned for certainty that the thing could not be done that way, and we would have to try some other way.”
 
Why is it then, that when things go quite wrong, we sulk, suffer, pout, blame, and feel defeated? We may give-up. We may feel like a victim of circumstance, our partners, the economy, or the system. Or we may feel less-than… incapable, unworthy, or talentless. And why do we hold others in such treacherous space when they fail? Without the encouragement, help in reflecting on what did not work, and confidence that can be found in not giving-up on the person, how will they ever hope to see the gift of clarity that failure can bring?
 
I believe we have choked out more creativity, joy and passion through “holding each other accountable,” than we can fathom, largely because that phrase has come to mean, to some, “cataloging each other’s failures”.

In contrast, I’ve heard great leaders say, “Fail quickly and change direction thoughtfully. You have my full support, as many times as it takes.”
 
Can we say that to others? Can we say that to ourselves?
 
The next time you fail at something, especially if you fail spectacularly and entirely, celebrate that you have just eliminated some of the wrong directions. And just like in Wordle, once you do that, your next move may be more obvious.

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